Busy-ness

What is this busy-ness that seems, like a black hole, to suck time and life force?  What is happening here?

Business of being too busy to do what we really want or need to do requires the existence of time, both a future and a past.  Firm rootedness in the moment, trusting in the completeness of the moment, eliminates the possibility of being too busy or not productive enough. We are just busy enough.  Everything is flowing exactly as it should, as it can, as it will.  There is no winning the debate with what’s actually happening; everything is unfolding exactly on time.  It wasn’t the right time to do that other thing that our mind imagines: how do we know, because that’s what’s actually happening.  The imagination drives us crazy, thinking it should be other than what the moment shows us it actually is.  

The more wound up we become in thinking we should be doing things differently, the less easily the moment flows.  If there were something different we should be doing, then we become less likely to do it because we are so caught up in mental, and subsequent physical, tension.

The more trusting we are of the moment, the more we relax into the way things actually are, the more we watch our deepest intentions simply arise into creation.  These are the authentic intentions arising, not the ones we think we should have.  Sometimes the authentic and the guilt-associated intentions are just so different.  We think we should be accomplishing something, but our truer intention is that we simply should be relaxing.  Maybe we really should just be sitting there in a traffic jam so that we can sit still and look at the scenery. Or perhaps we should be learning the lesson of busy-ness.  

What is the role of distractions?  Our awareness flits here and there, not on the object of concentration.  But if the mind is wanting our awareness to expand outwards and we are unable to confine it to one point, perhaps that moment would best be served in expanding the awareness towards an outer Infinity.  Let it move outwards, encourage it to be all-aware, unlimited.  See imaginably, currently unmanageable, important tasks not getting done now in the larger context of importance and relevance, in the larger setting of the Universe.  

What feelings arise in the context of busy-ness?  Perhaps overwhelm.  Feeling into that feeling, explore.  My God, there is so much to do, I am so unable to accomplish the task and all of the other tasks, what am I to do?  Currently I cannot do this.  Can I really ever do anything?  Who is the Doer, anyway?  Upon whose shoulders does this Universe rest?  This crushing weight is unbearable, so I give it back to You.  I offer me to You, for You to do through me whatever and in whatever way You choose.

Perhaps guilt.  Oh God, I am so undisciplined.  Why are my expectations going unmet?  Are they arising from guilt or from love, from self-loathing or Self-respecting?  If they are arising from guilt, do I really, in this Age, want to act from there?  What does my pure heart truly desire?  Let’s look deeper; is this truly my heart’s desire?  If something is lying on top of this heartsong, don’t I prefer to clear this burden before proceeding any further, so that this creative impulse may grow in deep purity?

Or, now, gratitude.  Thank you, oh sense of being too busy and distracted to get things done.  You teach me.  Let me allow you to teach me more, when you arise again.  When I feel you, let me really feel you, hear you, and learn from you.  Let me be more real in relation to the moment and to my heart.  What’s really getting done here is much kinder than what I thought should be getting done.  Thank you.

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